Category: You Always Have Options

Do Work That Feeds Your Soul

5/23/2017

"Do whatever work feeds your true self, even if it's not a safe bet, even if it's like a crazy risk, even if everyone in your life tells you you're wrong or bad or crazy." ~ Leaving the Saints by Martha Beck

When my youngest graduated high school nearly four years ago, I set out to complete a dream that had already been twenty-years-in-the-making. When she was one-year-old and my life underwent a monumental change, I decided to become a Life Coach.

I'd been through such a life-altering experience that I knew I could help others in the same situation. And coaching has always been such an innate part of me; I just didn't have the formal training, nor the know-how to begin a business at that time.

And then, life happened. And my dream was set aside.

But upon my daughter's graduation two decades later, I knew it was time to dust off that old wish and just jump into it.

I quit my nursing job and sought out training.

People around me thought I was nuts.

But I felt where my heart was leading me, and it wasn't found in the halls of hospitals anymore.

By the end of the following year, I was a full-fledged life coach, but I was also still not making much money, and my savings account was quickly being drained.

Uh-oh.

I realized that my business would take longer to set up and make sustainable, so I found another nursing job to cover the bills for a while.

Friends and family sighed with relief.

But my soul started balking.

Nursing was not what my soul was longing for anymore; I'd had a good run spanning almost three decades, but it was time to pursue my new passion.

(Not surprisingly, the new nursing job didn't last long, either).

So I kept at coaching while my friends and family held their breath. At that point, even I began doubting my ability to become a life coach with a full-time clientele.

Even I began to think I was nuts.

It was taking much longer than I'd anticipated, it was draining my savings and retirement accounts, and I was losing faith that it would ever happen.

But I kept at it because I was following what made my soul happy: I hosted workshops; I wrote blogs and newsletters; I continued my weekly column; I spoke on the radio; and I kept working with clients.

And ever so slowly, somewhere along the way, it began to take shape. It's not yet a full-time gig, but that's okay. I'm happy; fulfilled; proud.

I continue to feed my true self, even on the days when it doesn't feel like a safe bet, because I trust that it will one day become what I've envisioned all along.

What about you?

What work would you do that feeds your true self, even if it's not a safe bet, even if it's like a crazy risk, even if everyone in your life tells you you're wrong or bad or crazy?

Much love,

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Are You Playing Full-Out in Your Life?

3/26/2017

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"A person will be called to account on judgment day for every permissible things he might have enjoyed, but did not." ~ The Talmud

I am constantly reminded of how short our lives really are, and how crucial it is to our own state of happiness that we enjoy our lives to the fullest.

A few years ago, a friend shared the following story on Facebook. It has haunted me ever since:

He had just lost his beloved 26-year-old niece, and he and his parents had stepped in to care for his great-nieces, who were 2 and 5 years old.

When kindergarten started for the 5-year-old that Fall, my friend was volunteering in her classroom and the activity that morning was to build something out of Legos, then show-and-tell it with the class.

My friend's niece confidently took her finished piece to the front of the class and set the square design onto the desk in front of her.

"It's a People-moving machine," she began. "It takes people to heaven," she explained while she maneuvered the claw-like appendage on the back of the "machine" and slid the Lego box across the table.

She went on to explain--as she bounced on her toes, clearly excited about her creation--that "Once you get to heaven, you have to answer one question to get through the gates."

Beaming, she looked into the faces of dozens of classmates and their parents, then continued:

"God will ask you: 'So, did you have fun?'"

As my friend relayed the story, he emphasized that the adults in the classroom went silent as they looked at each other in discomfort.

How could a child--who should've been grieving--be so wise?

I cried when I read that post, and nearly 3 years later, it's still hard for me to swallow.

Five powerful words: So, did you have fun?

This very young child had just lost her very young mother. She was living in a new home--surrounded by people she knew and loved--but it wasn't her environment, her home, or her familiar space.

Yet she already understood the value of life. And life continued despite her huge loss.

And according to her, life was about playing.

I played a lot when my kids were young. Having three to entertain daily was easy when I could take them to the park, the pool, McDonald's play area, a friend's home, a museum, or on some sort of trip.

The kids were both my excuse and my reason for playing. And we played hard. We also traveled often.

But now that they are off into their own lives, my level of play seems to have slowed down. I still play, but I don't often have the same child-like enthusiasm, or unbridled faith to race into new situations without some hesitance.

Being with my children brought out the kid in me. It also required that I play full-out, which I did. Some days, I was the biggest kid of all. And I loved it.

You'd think that now when I'm free from raising kids, I'd have this playing-thing down pat.

But you would be sadly mistaken.

Playing often gets stifled, put on the back burner, or ignored because I have other "important" things to do. And I usually attach it to needing money, but there are so many ways to play without costing a single cent!

Oy.

How about you? Do you play enough? Do you play full-out? Or, like me, do you often use excuses to forego playing more?

I don't know about you, but I'm ready to change this self-defeating habit. I'm ready to stop making excuses and PLAY FULL-OUT!

I challenge you. And I challenge myself.

Let's go play like children. Like nobody's watching.

Then tell me all about it...

Much love,

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You Always Have Options

1/21/2017

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Why do we stay stuck, unable to reach our dreams, complete our projects, or look forward to our futures?

Beyond the fear of moving outside of our comfort zones, there's also the frustration of stagnation. After all, we see the project, the dream, and our future, and we're suddenly wracked by immobility.

We feel overwhelmed, out of breath, freaked out by the prospect of getting "it" done.

How the hell will I get there? There's too much to do! It feels too big!

So we hide under the covers, ignore our desires, and before we know it, we feel stuck in cement--unable to move.

And nothing gets done. Then the dream dies, the project stays incomplete for months or years, and our futures continue to look bleak.

But what if we took a new tact?

As an empty-nester, I'm considering what to do with a home that's outgrown me. I fixed it up last year with the intention of renting out my extra space. My goal was two-fold: to use the space wisely and to earn some extra income.

But I've been caught in the frustration of not finding a suitable renter, while spending lots of money on a home that's too big for little ol' me.

I could stay stuck in the frustration that "nothing's working" (believe me, I have!), or change my perspective just a tish.

Instead of fretting, I could consider other options.

Because my primary goal is to increase my cash flow, I can look beyond the idea of renting and consider all of the possibilities I already have available to me: I could sell my home and move into a smaller place, or become a roommate in someone else's home; I could develop more creative ways to sell my books; or create more workshops; or sell some furniture; or increase my hours at work; or...

As I write about other ways to increase my income, I'm no longer fixated on needing to move out of my home (which causes panic). I can look at the bigger picture and consider many more possibilities (which allows relaxation).

Even if some of the options may not be viable right now, they still offer new and different alternatives, which leads to more excitement, which then spurs a new list of possibilities, which hypes up my enthusiasm about my future. I have also come up with possibilities that I may not have been able to see previously.

I may not need to move out (panic), but can consider something entirely different (ah, sigh).

So the next time you feel stuck in glue about a decision, project, or a dream--expand your field of vision. "Brainstorm the ridiculous" by jotting down a list of possible options for solving the challenge you are facing.

Be creative, be different, be ridiculous.

Some new idea, a better alternative, or a fun adventure may best solve the challenge of your project, your dream, and your future. Something new and daring may pop out at you.

Then go do THAT.

Much love,

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Do Work That Feeds Your Soul

Are You Playing Full-Out in Your Life?

You Always Have Options

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