Back From Betrayal
Katie Kramer, RN/Life Coach/Author
  • Home
  • Coaching
    • Working With Me
    • Where is Katie?
  • Is This You?
  • Bookstore
    • Coming Through With Grace >
      • Excerpts
    • Life-Bits e-books
    • When Silence Is Broken
  • Cancer, My Guru
    • "Moving On" Blog
  • About Katie
    • My Story
  • Contact

When Clients Hate Their Coach...

3/11/2017

0 Comments

 
"Seek a coach who scares you a little. Encounters with great coaches tend to be filled with feelings of respect, admiration, and, often, a shiver of fear. This is a good sign." ~ Dan Coyle 

I'm not out to scare my clients, but I do understand how I sometimes instill fear in them.  

I often require the people who work with me to do or say things that scare the crap out of them. They trust me enough to do it, while they simultaneously hate me for nudging them out of their comfortable lives to do something daring.

It brings up all of their discomfort. All of their insecurities. All of their blocks about why they couldn't do the daring thing before I became their coach.

I get it.

But in order to grow beyond where they are now, they have to endure feeling uncomfortable while leaping into an unknown future.

It's why so many people refuse to do it. It brings up so much discomfort that some people prefer walking back into their comfortable and predictable lives--the same lives that sent them into coaching with me in the first place.

Staying safe is often preferable to feeling freaked out. Even if that safety means they don't get to have their dream lives, dream marriage, or dream job.

They sell themselves short. But that's how much they allow their fear to dominate their lives.

If they let it.

The only way to circumvent that fear is to just do it, anyway. Action is the antidote to fear.

I used to be terrified of public speaking, even though I also felt a giddy high while behind any podium. But for some unknown reason, my body hated it. I shook. My voice cracked and stuttered. My knees trembled.

How could I want to be a public speaker so badly when I could barely stand in front of a group without also wanting to vomit or flee?

I tried again and again, but finally felt too afraid to continue. I became afraid of my fear: afraid of looking, acting and sounding stupid by trembling or stuttering. So I held myself back, and kept the public speaker in me "safe" by rarely introducing her.

I can't tell you when it changed, but one day a few years ago, I'd had enough of my fear. I suddenly realized that I didn't care if my body went into hysterics. I didn't care if I threw up. I didn't care if I fainted. I had a story to tell and damn it, I was going to tell it!

And guess what happened?

The fear disappeared.

I'm not joking when I say it disappeared that moment. So it was never public speaking that caused the fear in the first place; it was my fear of embarrassment of how my body would react that made me shut-down.

Once I no longer cared about looking foolish, my fear of humiliation had no impact on me anymore. It could no longer scare me because I was no longer fretting about it or anticipating its arrival.

What about you?

Are you willing to face your fear and do that one scary thing, anyway?

Feel your anxiety? Do it anyway.

Hear your voice trembling? Say it anyway.

Feel your heart beating wildly? Face it anyway.

Just Do It! as Nike proclaims, and you'll find peace and joy and celebration waiting on the other side. 

Try it.

You may even begin to love it.  


0 Comments

    Author

    After being raised in the mid-west, I migrated south for high school (with a year in Brazil) and college, and ventured west for a long marriage (and later, divorce)...and eventually landed in the northwest--my real home. Sigh. 

    I am a Teacher, Healer, Single Mother, Nurse, Coach, Columnist, Artist, Author, Traveler, Motivator...eager to share myself with you. 

    Archives

    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    July 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    October 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    March 2014

    Categories

    All
    And Coaching
    Angels Among Us
    Are You Playing Full Out In Your Life?
    Are You Playing Full-Out In Your Life?
    Awesomeness
    Betrayal
    Breathe
    Care For Your Anxious
    Cave Early
    Claustrophobia
    Death Without Benefits
    Do Work That Feeds Your Soul
    Do You Feel Your Pain
    Everyday Magic
    Exhausted Self
    Finding Answers In Nature
    Follow The Fidget
    Freaking Out From The Frontage Road
    Getting Kicked In The Gut By Life
    Healing
    HIS Problem Is Not MY Problem!
    It Could Be You
    Just Breathe
    Make An Impact
    Marriage To A Sex Addict
    Moments Of Miracles
    Moving On
    MRI
    Or Act It Out?
    Pay It Forward...
    Radical Self Care
    Radical Self-Care
    Really Want?
    Ring In The New Year
    Send The Love
    Single Parenting
    Single-Parenting
    Strenthen Your Intuitive Muscle
    The Fall-Out From Sex Abuse
    The Power Of Knowing
    This Wasn't My First Rodeo
    Tribal Shaming
    Walter Ego
    What Do You Really
    When Clients Hate Their Coach
    When Love Shows Up Unexpectedly
    Would You Choose Option B?
    You Always Have Options
    Your Ally
    Your Body
    Your Life Wants To Get Your Attention

    RSS Feed

Sign Up Now
For Email Marketing you can trust.